Dating is like buying a car

Tonight I went to an awesome singles service @ Watermark called the Porch. The singles pastor, JP, started a series called "Boy Meets Girl". Its a five part series about dating, which lets face it, I need all the help I can get! 

JP used a great analogy on buying a car and finding a potential mate...which I love, and am totally going to steal and put in my own words! 

So I think my problem is, like when buying a car, I know what I like (something really shiny, dependable, and in-between flashy and family) but don't really have an exact list of what I am wanting to purchase. But to be honest, if I were to talk on a car lot right now, I have no idea what I'd be looking for, or even what model I would even be interested in buying for the next 6-7 years! I can't even visualize myself in a new car, becauese I don't know what I want. I know I want a new car, but I haven't really taken the time to do the research as to what I want. Maybe that is the problem with my dating life... I know what is appealing, but I don't really have a criteria set for what I am looking to spend the next 40-50 years with! Marriage is a much bigger commitment to me then choosing a car is!

I think in the past I set my standards low for what I was purchasing. I just wanted to get in a new car (relationship) so bad, that I made it work. I was blinded by the test drive, and all of the sudden was signing the paperwork and working out a seven year (or seven month) loan. At least that was the scenario with Mr. Wrong, he had the outward appeal of being a good guy, but really on the inside needed a lot of tuning up. D was the dependable "Camry" relationship of my life- I knew he had the potential to be a great husband, and I knew he was serious about being stable... unfortunately that relationship was a loaner. Mr. Social, well as the most recent relationship, I would compare him to his actual car- a hummer. He was larger then life, and was constantly being notice with others- he was lacking the dependability I needed. He was too  flashy and into being seen instead of settling down.

After tonight I think I really need to sit down, and figure out what I'm looking for in the big car lot called dating in Dallas. There are so many models out there; and while I know not all of them are bright, shiny and new, I also know I don't want to buy a car for its exterior appeal. I want to look under the hood, check out the trunk size (get your head out of the gutter... I move a lot, I need someone that can help!), and really decide if this is a car I can depend on.

So over these last few days of summer, I am going to make my list of criteria that I'm looking for in a car (hmm boy). I don't want to be taken advantage of when I walk out on that car lot us single girls refer to as Uptown. I'm not going to waste my time with a sales guy who is selling me all the wrong things. I will not be persuaded to settle for anything less then my dream car aka dream man.

More to come... Strap on your seat belts!

Doctors finish last

All day yesterday I was kinda nerved when it came to my upcoming date with Dr. McHarmony. To be honest I didn't really want to go, because in my heart of hearts I knew there wasn't a spark there. Regardless I talked to some of my life advisers (aka my ladies from work) and they agreed that I should forge ahead and date as many boys as I can! I trusted their advice and psyched myself up about meeting up for a drink with the Doc after my girls church group (yes I know its ironic to go to church one minute, and then go get a drink the next... but its all good).So I spent my Monday afternoon dolling myself up thinking that at any minute I would get a call from the doctor confirming our date that we had agreed on last Thursday. 

Well he never called.... I was all dressed up at my bible study with no where to go. In my heart of hearts I wasn't mad at being somewhat stood up, I was actually relieved. Dr. McHarmony made it very easy for me to move on. As my nurse friend said, emergencies in radiology are few and far between. So it's not like the guy was saving a life, instead maybe he was saving his heart because he could tell in my tone last week that I was over it. 

The night didn't end so horribly, during my group I looked at my phone and noticed that Mr. Social had texted me and invited me to meet up with him and his bro later that night for a glass of wine. How crazy is that? One guy ditches me, and the one I actually want to hang out with asks me out! Go God! 

After leaving my girls I headed downtown and met up with the brother duo. I had a diet coke as I tried to fight a migraine, but overall had a great time. Hanging out with Mr. Social is fun and easy. He is SUPER enthusiastic about everything, and understands my sarcasm. The only thing that I'm nervous about is how nice he is... not a bad problem I realize. But I typically go for jerks who act like they are uninterested in me. Mr. Social isn't like that, he always acknowledges me, uses good eye contact, and often uses touch through proximity to show he is listening. I think the issue lays on my part, I need to get over going to jerks. 

They always say nice guys finish last, but in this case, doctors finish last!

Dating a pair and a spare

Remember to always date a pair & a spare...then you will never ever be lonely.- Millionaire Matchmaker

I'm wondering if this is good advice, regardless I'm taking it. I'm currently talking to two guys (Mr. Social and Dr. McHarmony) and I recently started chatting with a new guy from eh (no name for him yet). I'm not sure how this whole dating three guys thing works, in the past I could barely handle two guys (D and M). 

However so far this is what dating three guys looks like- me waiting for Mr. Social to set up a date, Dr. McHarmony calling and texting all the time and setting up a date for next week already, and then new eh guy blowing up my email, constantly sending me his number for me to text him. UGH! Why is it the one you want to go out with doesn't have a clue what is going on. I know I need to keep my options open and not put all my eggs in one basket. So I'm doing just that, I'm setting up a date with the Dr. and chatting up with the new guy. 

The problem is this thing called a conscious that I often listen to. I kinda feel like I'm leading the doctor on. He is a great guy, but I don't get all pumped up when he calls. In fact tonight when he called, I let it go to voice mail and then finally called him back. I kinda gave him a white lie that my friend was over so I didn't have to talk long! I know, I'm horrible! Am I just using him for the attention and a fabulous meal? Or do I think that maybe on date 2 I will grow to like him more? 

Mr. Social and I have yet to go on a second date due to the fact that we have both been out of town traveling the past few weeks. First I was in SF then he was in Mexico. Now we are both back in Dallas, 4 blocks away from each other, but haven't had any face time. He calls, he texts, but he can't set up a time for us to see each other in person. Kinda annoying when you are a planner, and don't fly by the seat of your pants when setting up a date. The dude even bought me a bracelet on his trip...guess this is another time when I need to practice my patience. 

Now introduce new guy...maybe that will be his name. We were matched off EH and to be honest I thought his pictures were way out of my league. He is a very attractive guy, so I was kinda shocked when he responded to my communication so quickly, and then continued to pursue me. I guess I should just give this guy a chance, for all we know he can trump McHarmony and Mr. Social. 

I wonder how the Millionaire Matchmaker feels about dating two pairs.... hmmmm

Mr. Social

How do I know when I have a bit of a crush??? When I start playing the game... as Gaga would say,  "The Love Game".

I'm the type of girl who radiates security and calmness when I think of you as just a guy, but when I start thinking of you as I guy I like, I'm nothing but a basketcase on the inside.

Yesterday I went on a date with Mr. Social (previously known as FB boy, I will elaborate on the name change in a minute). It was great! We went on a cute day date downtown off Main Street. We went from his high rise apartment building parking garage, and strolled down the street to a trendy mexican cantina. From the moment we sat down at the patio table that I started to slowly go from power woman to teen age girl. I was digging this guy and what he had to offer.

Mr. Social is an amazing guy, I've learned so many things about him the past few days . He is far from the casual tshirt and jeans guy I had met both times at the bar. He is a funny, driven, and thoughtful guy. I call him Mr. Social because he is the "group leader" of his frat pack. From his hilarious stories I learned that he is the go to friend for planning fun and leaning on when times are tough. I think these are all awesome qualities, and I see many similarities between our personalities and roles in our friendships.

Our date went really well, we walked through downtown and he let me check out his cool digs. Yes, I went to his apartment but it wasn't like that... it was during the day and literally I just wanted to see his view and check out the pool. Mr. Social lives at a very upscale apartment (hello concierge) with incredible views of downtown Dallas, and his pool has parties every weekend that headline magazines! After a few minutes of hanging out on opposite sides of his huge sectional couch, I said it was time for me to go. He walked me to my car, and I gave him a first date hug. (That's right... no kisses from this girl until atleast date 3... I'm old school and I like it). As I was pulling out of the underground parking garage, I recieved a text from him that said "PS you are pretty swell". I took that as a sign he thought it was a good date as well. We continued to text throughout the day and into the night. 

Then this morning, after a night home alone over analyzing our date and every question I asked. I realized I might have a bit of a crush on this guy. Mr. Social is definitely someone I want to see more in the future! Unfortunately for me, I made a rookie mistake, I texted him today. I justified it with the fact that he texted me last, and I was simply replying the the conversation. DUMB MISTAKE. Naturally I haven't heard from Mr. Social and am starting freak a bit. Was the crush short lived on his part? Or is he just busy with friends today? Mr. Social did accept my friend request on Facebook that I sent last night (he said I had to re-add him, since I was the one who defriended him a few months ago), but did he find something on my page he didn't like?

Sometimes it really sucks being a girl! After writing this, I realize that I'm being a wimp about this whole thing. I just need to suck it up, pack for my fabulous trip to San Francisco (Preppy and I leave tomorrow at 6 am), and just give it to God. I want a guy who will persue me! Plus confidence is sexy, lack of esteem isn't!

Mr. Social- balls in your court! 

Yes, I defriended you and now we're going on a date

Flashback to 4 months ago, I head out for a girls night with my friends, with the mission of slutting one of my friends out (she was in need of a bar boy make out session). We went to Barcadia off Knox/Henderson and sat inside at a long table. A group of guys sat down next to us, all very decent looking. So being the good friend I am, I strike up a conversation in attempt to whore out my friend. Of course it turns out the guy I start talking to is tells me him and his group of friends went to my same alma mater. We instantly find we have alot of things in common, he is really great, but I am dating someone and my intentions are to hook him up with my girl. He adds me on facebook and leaves to hop to the next bar with his crew, inviting us to join. I politely deny and head with my girls to another bar. The next few days he messages me and invites me to a St. Pats parade. I instantly think that he is some sort of man whore who picks up girls at the bar and dates around. At this point of time I am uninterested because 1) I am dating someone 2) this guy met me at a bar 3) his profile picture has him with tons of girls... I deleted him from facebook.

Fast forward to two days ago. I'm out at my kick ball league's mid summer party. It's hot, my girls and I are at a table seated near the free beer, and this guy approaches me. He said he new me from kickball (I called bull), then the truth came out that he was that guy from Barcadia... I felt like the biggest B. I told him I defriended him, and we laughed about it. He turns out to be a really sweet guy, and we have been talking since Saturday. Tomorrow night we are going on our first official date. Maybe it is possible to meet someone at a bar...twice? As FB boy (facebook boy) said in one of our texts tonight "But fate did make us run into each other twice"

Dr. McHarmony

Ok its official, I went on a date with a real, live, breathing, doctor tonight... yes, I am in shock as much as you are dear reader.

I went on a blind date with a guy who on his profile wrote he was a "consultant". I was into that, he was taller then me, older then me, and seemed like a southern gentleman. He called me on Sunday night and we set up our date at a local wine bar in Addison Circle. Major brownie points for picking a wine bar as a first date! From our conversation I gathered he was a pretty down to earth good guy with a Louisiana accent.


So I walk up to the wine bar and found him outside at a table. He was cute in a geeky way, which was cute in itself. He got up and gave me a hug and we instantly started talking about his work. Remember, I thought he was some sort of business consultant. He started talking about radiology and how he enjoyed working at several hostipals in the area. Of course I start thinking, this guy lied to me about his job, and he is really some sort of x-ray technition or some other job along those lines. I was kinda irritated that he hadn't been clearer on his profile about his job! He kept talking about his group, and then finally dropped "med school" in his sentance. I'm sure I looked like a dear in headlights when I put two and two together and found out he was a consultant for a medical group, this dude was a legit Radiologist who went to one of the best med schools in the nation... wow did I feel stupid. I was so in shock for about 5 minutes about all my wrong assumptions...I'm pretty sure I acted like a complete nut for the next few minutes trying to process my misconceptions of this poor guy. Was I attracted to him because he was sweet and geeky or because he was this super smart guy who saved lives of cancer patients??? 


On a scale of 1-10 I would give our date a 7+. I was myself, sarcastic, whitty, and at times silly. I couldn't tell if he appreciated that or thought I was a complete bimbo! Lol. Why is it when I hang out with smart people that I sometimes dumb myself down or act like a ditz? I mean I had only had half a glass of wine at this point! Lol.


We did share alot of good stories about kids and my experiences of working in the hospital setting. I made the mistake of joking around that his family was all doctors... turns out they are... SERIOUSLY? It was like I kept sticking my foot in my mouth.


Dr. McHarmony did do several things right- he picked a wine bar for our first date, he was able to hold conversations that were trivial and intellectual, he picked up the tab without me having to do the whole offering to pay jig, he had manners, and he walked me to my car. 

The verdict is out about how I feel about Dr. McHarmony. He is a great guy, with a big heart. We had great converstaion, and he has lots of cool life experiences. I'm just not sure if he is the one. I'm not sure if my friends would think we "go together" based on our looks and personalities. Then again looks aren't everything. Dr. McHarmony is a decent looking guy, but I didn't see myself kissing him goodnight.


We will see if Dr. McHarmony calls and we further this Grey's Anatomy love. Dating a doctor would be kinda hot! Lol. Of course tomorrow night I do have a another date... with a pilot.

St. Anthony find me a huband

This past year I celebrated my friend's birthday at a local restaurant called Cafe San Miguel. They have an awesome brunch, but probably the most amazing thing about this venue is their women's bathroom. The bathroom is a tribute to St. Anthony of Padua aka the Patron Saint of love and marriages. It is decked out with prayers for the single woman to St. Anthony. From this bathroom I learned that the Mexican and South American custom is for single women to turn St. Anthony upside down and pray to him for a husband. Now I was raised catholic and have heard of people doing lots of things with a St. Anthony Statue in efforts to sell their house or to help them find lost articles, but this was the first time I have heard of praying to St. Anthony to find you a husband!

June 13th is St. Anthony's Day, and while I didn't get to revisit the bathroom at Cafe San Miguel on this holy day, I was able to do a little research. I found this out, and plan on trying it... (hey I mean anything is worth a shot right?)

Find That Love With St.Anthony 

If you are tired of looking on your own for your soul mate let St.Anthony give a hand.

St.Anthony of Padua is the patron of love and marriages.  

Things You'll Need

• Small St. Anthony statue
• Brown candle
• bowl big enough to place candle in with water.

-Find a place where you can put your candle and your St.Anthony statue with out being disturbed.

-Then fill the bowl with enough water to cover the candle, and place the brown candle in it.

-Then next to the candle place St.Anthony upside down. Yes.. You read this right. With his head down and his feet up....

-Light the candle and say this prayer to St.Anthony

O Holy Saint Anthony, gentlest of Saints, thy love for God and charity for His creatures made thee worthy when on earth to possess miraculous powers. Miracles waited on thy word, which thou were ever ready to speak for those in trouble or anxiety. Encouraged by this thought, I implore thee to obtain for me a husband. The answer to my prayer may require a miracle; even so, thou art the Saint of Miracles. O gentle and loving Saint Anthony, whose heart was ever full of human sympathy, whisper my petition into the ears of the sweet Infant Jesus, who loved to be folded in thy arms, and the gratitude of my heart will ever be thine. Amen.

-After you have said the prayer concentrate and ask him to help you find the right person for you.You tell St.Anthony that you will keep him that way until he helps you find the right person for you.And every so often you should meditate and remind him of what you want.

From: How to Find That Love With St.Anthony | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/how_4591521_that-love-stanthony.html#ixzz1OSYj4x5b

I also found this cool blog about a similar restaurant in Mexico. Check it out. 

 

http://arollingcrone.blogspot.com/2011/02/let-st-anthony-find-your-true-love.html

Yes, I did email the lady and ask for a copy of the prayer they give out... for you single ladies I will forward it to you once if I hear back from her.... if not who is in for a upcoming trip to Cafe San Miguel to stalk to bathroom?  

Feel free to send any St. Anthony statues or tokens my way... I mean anything is worth a try right?

They always come back...

I was super pumped up today! It's my first official day of summer break... no work until August! I had it all figured out, I was going to meet my sorority sister up for a "marathon catch up" lunch, and then spend the rest of the afternoon tidying things up, working out, and laying poolside. Now granted I did accomplish all those things, but I did them while going through several extreme emotions. Emotions brought upon my delightfully planned out day, by Mr. Wrong aka the ex.

It's almost as if he was sitting at the table next to us on the patio at Mi Cocina. I had just finished telling my girlfriend how I was completely content at this moment with being single. I was over all the bad breakups and hurt feelings, I had moved on and was at peace. I no longer had a sense of urgency to crawl every bar for a boy, but trusted that the right one would come along at the perfect time.

As soon as I pulled out of the parking lot I got a text from a famliar number, with a familar phrase..."JBlaze" was all it said, but that one word was enough to make my heart race and whole body turn numb. He had texted me, calling me his pet nickname. I was shocked, I didn't know what to do, all those emotions that I had forced to the back of my head came spilling out from dark places. I started thinking about how I should I react? Should I react? Should I reply? I didn't want to talk to him, I had moved on, so why now? What did he want? What did I want?AHHHHHH.

I phoned several friends, none of which answered (can't blame them since it was 1:15 on a workday). So I tried to sooth myself. I did as I went through feelings of anger, sadness, guilt, anger, flattery, bitterness, contentment, anger, frustration, and then finally peace. One of my friends called me back, and I told her what had happened. She was awesome in that she didn't tell me what to do, but let me tell her what I planned to do. I was going to delete the text and not respond. I knew as soon as the number was deleted from my phone, that I would be "safe" again. My other friend called and agreed that was probably the best idea, especially since our weekend plans included drinks on the patio. Having the number in my phone, would probably lead to a bad choice after a glass or two of wine. 

I took my frustration out on the treadmill and at Target. Between the cardio and the shop therapy I was clear minded again. I was restored to my delightful day!

I was really proud of myself for not falling into Mr. Wrong's game. That is all it was to him, a game, a shear moment where he got what he wanted and I got nothing. I reminded myself that I didn't ever see myself settling down with him (not that he offered that in that small concise text). He is called Mr. Wrong for a reason! I now know that I deserve more then he could ever give me. I've grown so much since the heartbreak he caused to my soul.

Why is it that guys always come back, and never when you want them to? Every guy from my past has tried to reconnect at some point, usually months or years after its over and I've put the relationship to pasture. It's like they sense you are over them, and want to jump back into your mind. Also, why is it that they always pop back up when you are single or lonely? It's a great temptation to play the game, but its a game where no one wins. In this case, especially me. I refuse to waste any more time on someone who wasn't willing to break up with me in the mature way...face to face.

My church group is doing a book study, and in this week's assigned reading it is all about forgiveness. As I laid at the pool this afternoon, I read the chapter assignment and thought of Mr. Wrong. I had to forgive him completely for his actions or my heart would be filled with constant torment and bitterness. So I said a little prayer for Mr. Wrong that I could forgive him for how I felt he wronged me, and asked God to watch over him.

This is just another prime example of why I need to change my phone....

How to date my friends

Here are some tips for guys on how to get the "Friend Stamp of Approval" on a girl they are interested in. This information was all obtained over the past few weekends. (This goes out to you S.T.)

1. If you want a girl to like you, you need the approval from at least one of her friends.
2. Yes, you should buy her friends drinks... you're a guy... you make more (hopefully)
3. Whoops... I should mention that even if you don't drink, you should be cool with her drinking, and offer to be the DD.
4. When we go out in a group, you should bring several available friends for her single friends to flirt with. Don't have any friends? Well I suggest meeting some. 
5. Don't stalk her, its not attractive. No one likes a needy guy.
6. You should request the friend's friendship on facebook, that way we can stalk your friends to see if they are normal looking.
7. Hiding your age is not cute. Dude, it's not like you can change it.
8. We expect you to be attentive to our friend the entire time. Remember, we ARE judging your every move; especially the first meeting.
9. If you invite her and her friends to hang out, have it planned. No one likes waiting around for you to figure it out. We are girls, we like to have plans. Also, make sure you know the other people you invite to hang out. You want to make yourself look popular.
10. When we hang out, don't hit any other girls...especially not other girls who are in our group of friends!
11. Handshakes are appropriate at the beginning and the end of meeting us. We are not at the "hugging it out" stage, remember you are still being judged.
12. If you know our friend is out with her girls, please don't blow up her phone every 3 minutes. Sending one cute text is cool, but don't over do it. 
13. Be confident, but not cocky.
14. Don't pout if our friend pays more attention to us then you, remember you're the new guy here. 
15. Don't get the friend's number. That is only cool if you make it to bf/gf status and you are asking us what cut of a diamond she wants.
16. Don't text the friend to ask for relationship advice. We are not going to help you out buddy. If you are in the dog house, you've earned it, and we've already heard all about it!
17. Did I mention that having single friends for her single friends is a definite plus???
18. Eating seven hot dogs in public is not attractive, especially if its not a competitive food eating contest. 
19. Be friendly and personable. No one likes a moody mope. 
20. Be honest. We do our Google research... we will find out.

Weekly wrap up

This week is proof that your life can change dramatically in a week! This week was fast and furious, but filled with excitement. 

Monday- I started my high protein, no carb diet. Then went to bible study with my girls. 

Tuesday- Met with my "support group" aka several other professional counselors who meet weekly for happy hour and comradery. Went to singles service at church, then headed downtown for Top Golf with my crew. Stayed out till midnight...something I have not done on a Tuesday in FOREVER! But I was in good company!

Wednesday- Phone call from my morning buddy- who asked if I was moving apartments, to which I said no. Drove to Uptown after work, randomly went into a apartment complex, and signed a lease! Probably the most spontaneous thing I have ever done, definitely life changing! Then went to a Habitat for Humanity Group for Young Professionals, met some new peeps. Felt uptowny. Continued with my low carb diet- had only 1/2 a beer (pretty impressive I thought).

Thursday- First night of KICKBALL! So much fun! Impressed my team and myself by actually making the contact with the ball and getting on base. Met a lot of fun new people; went Uptown for post game drinks and the Mavs game. Ran into a guy I know... who decided to drunk text me at midnight saying he would come over and make out... HILARIOUS as I didn't respond. Really... that is a whole blog on itself

Friday- Date night with myself- see previous blog for details.

Saturday- Quality time with my mom. Kept my monthly saving money goal of not buying a new shirt or earrings.... however I might have bought 3 dresses, but hey I'm going to be needing those for my new lifestyle. That evening I went with my CB girls to Taste of Addison. Watched teenagers make out and college kids drink beer- we sat there sober and were transformed back to 1997 as we listened to the Third Eye Blind Concert. Note to self: If I ever go back to this festival, wine or at least eating is necessary.

Sunday- Slept in, and went to an awesome brunch with my girls. We went to a trendy local- Nick and Sam's Grill. I loved the people watching and the vibe of the restaurant; however the Dallas humidity is really killing my new hair look. Then when it was over, planned my trip to SAN FRANCISCO for the summer!  Super pumped! Not only am I going to go on a cool summer trip, but I am going to get to cross off things on my 30x30! Napa and Sonoma are going to ROCK! 

In conclusion here the wrap up- no carbs-down 5 lbs, lots of social opportunities, new apartment in the heart of all the Dallas action, growing friendships, summer plans for SA! 

Life is GOOD! So glad the world didn't end ;)

The best date ever

I just got home from the best date ever!!! It was exactly what I needed on a Friday night. There was a good food, great conversation about our accomplishments and future goals, pampering, candle light, and a movie! I spent the entire night with the person in this world who means the most to me, Myself.

A few years ago I would have hidden undercover before admitting that I flew solo on a Friday night, but these days its a sacred time I look forward to having. These days my social calendar is packed (which I adore), but sometimes a girl needs to slow down and spend some quality ME time. 

I started my night by coming home, and changing into a cute outfit. I picked up the phone and took a gamble that my favorite hairstylist would have a late Friday night appointment open. Lucky for me she did. I went to the Galleria, looked at all the pretty things (didn't buy anything, which I'm proud of), got my brows shaped (a painful threading process), and then met with my hair girl. She treated me to a ice cold diet coke, and extra long shampoo. (Why is it that someone else washing your hair feels so good?). As I sat and got my luscious flocks trimmed, we talked about all the exciting things I have had going on in my life. For a few minutes it felt like bragging, but then I started to feel good about telling her all the awesome things that are going on in my life. I realized a lot of good things had happened since the last time I had checked in with her. Don't you just love how hairstylists let you blab on and on about yourself? Lol. Part of my occupation entitles asking other people all the questions, so for once it was great to have all the focus on me!

After I was nice and relaxed from the head massage and new sleek hair, I walked around a little more soaking up all the pretty things and getting excited about new adventures. In my mind I started thinking about what I would wear on the beach this summer in San Francisco or what color nail polish I should put on for my upcoming Sunday Funday Brunch. I even looked for new workout capris to go with my hunter green (ugh) kick ball shirt! 

When I came home at 9:00, I didn't feel bad about pulling my car into the mostly vacant parking garage at my apartment complex. Instead I felt cozy and ready to unwind. I instantly changed into my baggy t-shirt and comfy pj shorts. Turned on my 86% full DVR, light a candle, and poured myself a big glass of water...yes reader, I agree a big glass of vino would be better, but I'm giving my liver a break. 

Sometimes in all the hustle and bustle you have to stop, relax, and take a break for yourself. All week at my job, I have been encouraging others to relax and make themselves a priority. As a counselor and busy girl, sometimes its important for me to stop and focus on taking care of me. In counseling we call this self care.

I encourage each of you dear readers, to treat yourself to some well deserved ME time. Whether it be a long hot shower, or nice glass of wine, find some way to be alone and enjoy. 


If you don't love yourself, no one else will either.

Weekly boy wrap up

TTU Boy- <3 one heart ranking

So the past few weeks TTU boy and I had been emailing. On Easter I broke it down and sent him my number. Well, little did I know that would start a flood of texts for the next two days. Generally when I'm dating someone I like to talk throughout the day through text or bbm, but this guy was blowing up my phone and I hadn't even met him in person yet! That was strike one, and a bit of a turn off. When dating someone, I still need a tad bit of mystery and game. 

We made plans to meet up Wednesday night at Ringo's Pub in The Shops of Legacy. I was kinda stoked at the location because I had been wanting to check the venue out. Between setting up the date, he send me his last name and told me to add him on facebook. So naturally I did only to be mortified that he was friends with this girl from my hometown, Heather. Heather was my little brothers friend, and was one of those girls that came from a great family yet was a complete skank. In fact I'm pretty sure the past several years I had referred to her as Skank Girl. I had a short panic attack when I saw that he was bffs with Skank Girl's husband. At that point I kinda weighed my options of not going on the date. Could I really be in a relationship with a guy who hung out with this nasty girl from my past? If TTU boy were to ask her about me, I'm pretty sure she would tell him about all the times I was rude to her and made her leave the college parties I was at... Strike two.... 

I decided to go ahead and push through with the date, maybe Skank girl had changed, and didn't realize how much crap I talked about her through high school and college.. haha yeah right...When he got there I found him attractive, but the more he talked, the more I felt like it was the TTU boy" show. He talked about his house, showed me pics of it and all the rooms he had redone on his iPhone. Then he showed me examples of his work on his phone, told me all about his business, his BMW, truck, and memorial day plans. I felt like I was an audience member listening to a highly paid speaker. I just kept smiling, nodding, and sipping on my Stella Artois. We ordered dinner, and then got into the discussion about our mutual facebook friends... Skank Girl was brought up.... Don't worry reader this part was actually a recovery moment for him. He too was not a fan of Skank Girl and in fact was relishing in the fact that his bff was in the works of leaving her and finalizing a divorce. That was definitely a interesting conversation, one that we somewhat connected on. Of course at that point he got out his phone AGAIN, got on facebook, and started showing me pictures of Skank Girl, and all of her friends that he had dated... wow... Then the bill came... now I'm always a girl who offers to pay, but I really didn't think this guy would let me. Sure enough, I reached to get my credit card, and he let me pay for my part. Strike Three, well really it should be Strike Four after the whole showing pictures of his exes thing. We left the bar soon there after, and he did the whole we will have to do this again thing. To which I enthusiastically said "yes most definitely, I had sooo much fun". WTH? Did I have fun? Not really, infact after writing this out, the date really sounds like a complete disaster. 

It took me two days and several glasses of wine the next day and painting a heart on a canvas (thank you Painting With A Twist and my favorite co-workers) to determine that I just wasn't that into him... Of course I figured this out after I tipsy texted him from my painting class. I think I did this to verify that even after several glasses of Pinot that I still didn't have any zing for him.

TTU boy offered all the right things on paper. We had tons in common, went to the same Alma mater, he had a great job, nice cars, expensive tastes, but he just isn't the one. The thought of having to go on another date with him now makes me a lil squeamish. Why is it that sometimes we so desperately want to make Mr. Wrong look like Mr. Right? I think my whole mentality with TTU boy was that he was better then nothing, and that maybe all the commonalities would bring us together. Not the case here, and I'm so glad I realized that. I'm still holding out for a guy that fills me with joy, makes me laugh, and treats me like a queen. 

A friend once told me that dating is a numbers game. You have to date a lot of guys before you are going to find the right one. I thought she was crazy, but now I am learning she is right. My old theory of the first serious relationship I have will be the one is definitely out the window. 

I know this may sound weird, but I just want to take a vacation from so desperately trying to get dates lined up in my schedule. I have this belief that the good Lord is going to put the right guy in the right place at the right time. I just need to practice more patience.