(Tattoo is not actual tattoo from boy!)
The Boy With the Dragon Tattoo aka TBWTDT and I met on Match. We were emailing for about a week, and then decided to meet up on Friday night. I was pretty excited because on paper he met all my criteria. He had a masters in accounting, was from Texas, owned a house, and had a great sense of humor. He suggested that we meet up for dinner, and I told him that I felt more comfortable meeting up for a drink before committing to dinner. (I am a firm believer that dinner is wayyyy too much for a blind date, drinks gives you an out if they are psycho/ugly). We decided we would meet up at a local Dallas hotspot, The Loon. I got there a few minutes early and sat in a booth. That is when TBWTDT had his first STRIKE.... he was 15 minutes late. He texted and said he was running a few minutes late, which I thought would be like five minutes...but no, it was longer.
When he walked in the door, I instantly thought he was cute and sat up a little straighter in the booth. He was tall, dark, handsome, and dressed nicely in his work clothes. We instantly jumped into conversation, and he got pretty deep really fast asking me about my previous relationships and why they didn't work out. For me the past relationship talk is more of a second or third date conversation, not something you bring up in the first 20 minutes of meeting someone, but I went with the flow and disclosed my past.
Things were still going ok and I was still vibing on him, when I made a comment about a girl at the table next to us who had a whopper tattoo on her back. Typically this is not something you would see in the uptown scene. He kinda paused and said he had a tattoo.
Disclaimer: I am not a tattoo snob. I acknowledge that some people choose to permanently ink their body, however this is something that I could never commit to! I am way too indecisive to decide which outfits I like, more less something that would permanently be on my body for the rest of my life!
I asked him about his tattoo and he said he had a dragon on his back. I told him about my disclaimer and then he divulged more. Not only did he have one tattoo of a dragon, but really it was two dragons fighting. I just kinda laughed and was like "ok that's cool, but why didn't you just say that to begin with". A few minutes later he shared EVEN MORE about his tattoo and how actually it was more like a scene of two dragons on his back that went from his waist all the way up to his back. STRIKE TWO! I instantly had a visualization of TBWTDT at my family's Annual 4th of July party. I imagined him in the pool playing with my nieces and nephew with a big ol' tattoo showing to my conservative family. Then he continued to say that eventually I would get to see his tattoo... greeeeeaaattttt I thought!
I decided that I would really try to think outside my box, and not judge a book by its dragon tattoo cover. So I agreed to go with him to another location to continue our conversation and grab another drink and dinner. We went to the next location and the first thing he did was reach into his pocket and pull out a cigarette. He also continued to smoke in front of me as we were leaving. STRIKE THREE... I think smoking is gross, and I can't imagine dating a smoker. I hate the way it smells, and think its not a healthy choice. TBWTDT didn't even try to hide this nasty habit from me on the first date. At least respect a girl enough not to smoke in front of a girl you are trying to impress. Plus I was kinda upset that he didn't put on his Match profile that he was a smoker.
After the date I really had to think about things. Is the reason I'm single because I am too judgemental? Should and would I give TBWTDT another try? Maybe the reason I was single is because I have too high of standards.
I talked with several of my friends that weekend and they all agreed that this guy did not seem like the guy for me. I though they were probably right; while I could probably get over the tattoos, I don't think I could marry a smoker. You can't change people, and have to accept each person as they are. I couldn't wrap my head around accepting the boy with the dragon tattoo.
He continued to text me and try to set up another time for us to hang out, it got to a point where it was just annoying. It was very annoying when he kept texted me about taking Saki shots and then asked me how my day was when he knew I was at my grandmother's funeral. This boy simply wasn't for me. Today he texted me and asked me if I was back from my week long trip to Italy, which I am. I could tell he wanted to set up another date, and I decided this past week when I was in Italy that I needed to be honest with him. For the first time in my life, I had to be the bad guy and break this relationship off.
I thought of how the last guy texted me and said he wasn't interested, and remembered the sting. I knew it sucked to be the reciever of that text, but I couldn't keep letting TBWTDT think he had a chance with me. So I did it. I replied to his text and tried to break it to him gently, saying that I didn't have time to pursue this relationship with him. He responded and said what I really meant, that I just wasn't interested in him... which is the truth.
When you like someone, you make time for them. I couldn't visualize myself dating a guy with a back inked up who smelt like smoke. Maybe that's judgmental, but he wasn't for me.
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